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  Phreaked Out 
  by POW and Ferdinando Neri 
  The following story is a purely fictional account. Any relationship to
  any real person living or dead is coincidental. The narrative deals with the
  non-consensual torture and death of a human being, and is intended for mature
  readers who wish to view such material and for whom it is legal to do so. The
  authors in no way condone or promote such acts in real life.  
  Copyright (c) 2009 by Ferdinando Neri and by POW. For
  spam protection, animal names have been added to the authors' addresses -
  remove it to get their actual addresses. (ferdinandoneri
  zebra at yahoo dot it) and (POWauthor zebra at
  yahoo dot com). This story may be freely copied and distributed so long as it
  is copied in its entirety, including the author credit information and
  disclaimer. The authors welcome feedback.   
    
    
   It takes a long time to prepare a truly satisfying
  plan. My latest took me over two years to conceive and execute, but it was
  oh, so worth the time and effort. There is only one teensy little thing I
  would have done differently... 
  It began in a gay nightclub that I used to visit on occasion. I was
  leaning on the bar, watching the men dancing and cruising one another. The
  place was crowded and a knot of people began to form around me. Elbows and
  shoulders jostled and nudged and inevitably, some guy got bumped a little too
  hard and spilled his drink all over my shirt. 
  Now, I don't mind that so much. Accidents happen, after all. It was
  the guy's behavior afterward that really ticked me
  off. He offered no apology, but instead shoved me aside to demand a refill
  from the bartender. From the way he was dressed and the way he carried
  himself, it was clear that he thought himself a total top, the king of the
  hill, and therefore exempt from the rules of common courtesy that the rest of
  us mere mortals must follow. 
  I said nothing. Direct confrontation is not my style. Instead, I set
  about thinking of the best way to get my revenge... a revenge that would be
  served very, very cold. 
  A few discreet inquiries gave me his name. From there, it was fairly
  easy to track down where he lived, where he worked, what kind of car he
  drove, all sorts of details about his life. After that, I began to think of
  how I might best use what I had learned about him to bring him down. 
  Now, you may think that the punishment I meted out far exceeded the crime
  he committed. And you would be right. But, truth be told, the spilled drink
  was just a pretext. I was in that nightclub looking for someone to become my
  next victim. I really didn't have anyone special in mind, no more than a cop
  cares which particular speeder he pulls over. Gary just happened to be the
  unlucky winner. 
  A year later, I bought and moved into the condo-apartment next to
  Gary's. He, of course, did not remember the circumstances we had met under
  before, had no idea that we had already met, in fact. I introduced myself to
  him and to all the other neighbors on the floor,
  but didn't go out of my way to become friendly with him or any of them. We
  nodded hello when we passed in the hallway and that was all. 
  Over the next few months, I set up the rest of the tools I would need.
  First, I set up my phreaking equipment. Van Eck phreaking, if you haven't heard of it, is a nifty bit of
  spy technology that lets you wirelessly snoop on a nearby computer. Every
  computer screen, even the newer LCD models, leaks small amounts of radiation.
  With the proper tools, you can intercept that radiation - if you're close
  enough to the source - and reassemble it into an image of what's on the
  screen. It's not easy to do, but with patience it is possible. 
  Patience is one trait I possess in abundance. 
  It took me a while to get my setup working correctly. Once I did, I
  was able to watch everything that Gary did on his computer. Most of it was
  trivial, of course, and very boring to watch. He mostly used his computer to
  pay his utility bills, play games, and surf porn sites. Boredom doesn't
  bother me, though, if it's for a greater cause. My patience eventually paid
  off, because I learned that every once in a while, he would hook up with a
  guy online and go out to meet him. That provided the opening I wanted. 
  The other thing I did during this time was gain access to Gary's car.
  That was another boring but necessary task. I made a little
  variable-frequency radio transmitter and spent some long Sunday afternoons
  aiming the thing out the window. Press the button, wait, tweak the frequency
  a tiny nudge, press the button again. Eventually, I found the frequency that
  controlled the locks on Gary's Lexus SUV. I tried locking and unlocking it a
  few times to make sure I had the setting right, then put the thing aside. 
  Some months after that, I used my little tool to go out very early one
  Tuesday morning and install a little gizmo in his car. Nothing dangerous,
  just a little something to buy me a little time when I needed it. 
  And finally, two years after he spilled a drink on my shirt, I was
  ready to get my revenge on Gary. 
  
  It's quite hot. Better to take a shower. I have plenty of time. Gary
  will wait for me at nine, it's only eight. I undress, but the phone rings.
  It's my mother, from Italy. She is worried because I never call her. She
  wants to know about my job, but I hate to discuss my life with my mother. I
  try to avoid answering, but she is so nagging! When finally I am able to stop
  her, I am completely pissed. 
  I sit on the armchair and I begin to brood on my life here in the
  States. I hate brooding, but I cannot avoid doing so. 
  My father came to the States when I was seven. My parents told me that
  he had found a very good job, so he had to go and stay in America for a
  little while. I didn't realize, I was only a child, but it was obvious: my
  father and my mother couldn't go on together anymore. They were parting. 
  I missed my father, who for some years came back occasionally, only
  once a year, and later didn't come at all. I was twelve when they divorced,
  but then I had understood. My mother married again. My stepfather was kind to
  me and for some years everything was OK. Then the problems began. I couldn't
  stand him anymore, I was always answering him back, I was criticizing. I
  became stubborn. Now I tell myself the simple truth: I liked him, even if I
  didn't understand. 
  I had never been a good scholar, but things began to get worse and
  worse, my results went down and down. I failed my exams. 
  I was just beginning to have my first experiences with some comrades.
  Just some masturbation, nothing more. Then one of my teachers caught me and
  one of my friends in the changing-room, at school. 
  We lived in a little town in the south of Italy, where people are
  narrow-minded. It was a scandal. They laughed at us, they loathed us. My
  friend's family sent him in another town. 
  I refused to go out of the house, even to go out of my room. My mother
  was always crying, my stepfather scolded me, they wanted to send me to a
  psychiatrist. I refused. I was thinking to kill myself. I couldn't live there
  anymore. So I told my mother I wanted to go to America, where my father
  lived, to stay with him and to start afresh. My mother didn't agree, but my
  stepfather thought it was the only way to stop the scandal. So my mother told
  my father I would join him in the States. I was eighteen. 
  I don't think that my father was so happy to have me in his house: he
  had two children and my stepmother didn't like me. My father wanted me to
  study, but my English was very poor (it is yet very poor) and the school was
  a complete flop. Life with my father and his wife soon became impossible, I
  know I made myself hated. I had to leave home and to find a job. I found it,
  my beautiful job, at a gas station. Boredom, boredom, boredom. 
  I spend my time working, in the gym and surfing in Internet. No
  friends, no connections. When people see me, they think I am a chicano. Many like my body, strong, muscular, young. I
  can fuck as often as I like, but I am completely alone. 
  Shit! I am in a really bad mood now. In half an hour I should meet
  this man, Gary, and I am not going to enjoy it. I take the shower and I try
  to drive away the evil thoughts. I try to remember when I discovered Greasetank. It was a well in the desert! I read the
  stories, I looked at the images. I imagined myself as one of the men involved
  in these stories, killing and killed. It was great. I was the bounty hunter
  killed by an out-of-law, his belly full of lead. I was the soldier tortured
  and shot by an enemy officer. 
  I remember a story in which a German officer is hanged by the American
  soldiers, then they cut his cock and his balls. It made me horny every time I
  read it, it makes me horny even now. I imagined I was the American lieutenant
  sawing his German counterpart's genitals. And then I imagined that the
  following day the enemy made did the same to me, that they raped and
  humiliated me, that I was still living when they castrated me and could feel
  the knife cutting my flesh. I often think to these scenes when I fuck. They
  give a good taste to a plain fucking. 
  Good. I am horny, now, as I should be. I dress and I go out. 
  
  The exact timing was up to him, of course. I had no idea when he would
  next choose to go online and hook up with someone. So I made sure all my
  preparations were in place, then sat down to wait. 
  It didn't take long. A mere three weeks later, Gary came home from
  work one Friday night, fired up his computer, and began trolling for a date.
  I watched through my phreak screen as he sifted
  through the local gay chatrooms for some twink to blow a load with. He found a taker after only
  twenty minutes and arranged to meet him at a street corner a couple of miles
  from here later in the evening. 
  As soon as his plans looked solid, I used my remote control to fire up
  the gizmo I had installed in Gary's car. An electric motor began to run under
  the hood, draining lots of power from the battery but accomplishing nothing.
  In less than two hours, the battery would be so depleted that it would be
  unable to start the engine. Then I ran out to do some quick last-minute setup
  at my destination. 
  Twenty minutes later, I was back. I could hear Gary through the walls
  as he ate his dinner and got ready to go out. About ten minutes before his scheduled
  rendezvous, I heard him head out the door to the parking lot. I shut down the
  gizmo in his car, waited a minute, then went out to my own car, parked at the
  other end of the lot. By the time I drove past him, he was just discovering
  that his battery had died and was realizing that he was going to be a teensy
  bit late for his date. 
  
   
   
    | 
     The punk was waiting exactly where he said he would be. He looked
    just like the photo he had sent Gary: black-haired, perpetually-shadowed
    face, maybe 25 to 30 years old. Of course, I look nothing like the photo
    Gary had sent to him, which is why I had put on a hat and wraparound
    sunglasses. I pulled my car over and called his name. He hopped into the
    front seat and we were off. 
    The plan was that they would go back to Gary's place, so that's
    where I told him we were headed. I had wondered why Gary would waste his
    own time going to pick up his boink-buddy instead
    of just telling him to come straight to his place if that was where they
    were going to end up anyway. Then it occurred to me that it gave Gary an
    easy out - if he didn't like his date's looks, he could just drive on by,
    not bothering to stop. That was exactly the way Gary would think, which
    further convinced me that the arrogant prick deserved everything that was
    coming to him. 
     | 
    
     I am at the corner, near McDonalds. Gary should
    arrive. 
    A car stops. The man doesn't seem like the pic Gary sent me. 
    "You are Fred, aren't you?" 
    I nod. My name is Ferdinando,
    but nobody understands it, so I use this short form, Fred. 
    "And so you are Gary. Happy to meet
    you." 
    I sit next to him. I don't say anything else. I
    prefer not to speak. When they hear my foreign accent and my poor English,
    many men become suspicious, perhaps they think that I want to rob them, to
    cheat them. Foreigners are all thieves and cutthroats. When I am naked,
    nobody draws back. We can speak later, if we feel like it. 
    I look at him. Perhaps it's his hat. Or the
    glasses. But he doesn't seem the man of the pic.
    No problems. Two or three times I met people who had sent a pic of another man, younger or more handsome or better
    hung. Such a stupid thing to do! 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Neither of us made much conversation as we drove. I brought him to a
    mostly commercial neighborhood, lively enough in
    the daytime but pretty much deserted at this hour. I told him that my place
    was on the third floor of a certain building. The bottom floor was a
    lighting store (closed), the second was vacant, and the third was actually
    a dance studio, also currently closed. He looked like he was starting to
    get a little nervous, but when my key opened up the door, he followed me
    inside without a question. 
     | 
    
     "Here we are!" 
    I look at the building. There is a store, closed,
    at the first floor. It seems empty. I don't know why, but I don't like the
    place, in this area, completely deserted. 
    Stupid fantasy. 
    Gary opens the door and I follow him. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     That's when I slammed my elbow into his gut and he doubled over retching. 
     | 
    
     Argh! He hits me and I feel a strong
    pain in my belly. I double, too stunned to react. I realise that this son
    of bitch has handcuffed me! He forces me to rise. I am afraid, my belly is
    aching. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I slipped the handcuffs out of my pocket and wrestled them onto his
    wrists in less than fifteen seconds, locking his hands behind his back.
    Then I grabbed him by the hair and yanked him to his feet. He began to
    shout as I frog-marched him up the stairs, so I wrapped my arm around his
    throat and squeezed just tightly enough to lower the volume of his
    protests. It didn't diminish his struggles any. 
     | 
    
     I shout, I need help. I hope someone will hear me.
    He squeezes my neck. I can hardly breath. I try to free myself... I am
    strong, but with my hands behind my back and his arm around my neck, I
    cannot struggle. The stairs seem endless. He drags me on and on. I am
    choking. My lungs attempt to regain the air they need. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     We worked our way up to the dance studio on the third floor. It was
    a terrific space for my evening's entertainment - wide open, with a nice
    high ceiling, wooden floors, and no windows, just mirrors on all the walls.
    I fought my captive over to the center of the
    room where a chain was waiting, hanging down from the ceiling. I wrapped it
    around the punk's neck and snapped a padlock on to hold it in place. It
    wasn't tight enough to choke him, but it made sure that he couldn't move
    away from that spot. 
     | 
    
     Finally he opens a door and we enter a large room
    with a lot of mirrors. He drags me to the centre of the room and he grabs a
    chain. He wraps it around my neck and he blocks it. I cannot move. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I stepped away from the punk to put on my gloves and other
    evidence-suppressing protective gear. That may seem overly cautious - after
    all, I took the precaution of enrolling in a yoga class that meets once a
    week in this very room so that if the police find fragments of my skin or
    hair here, there will be a ready explanation for it. But I don't believe in
    taking chances, and did not plan on leaving any trace of my presence here
    tonight.  
     | 
    
     He takes his hat and his glasses off, then puts on
    other clothes until he is covered from head to toe, even his hands wear
    gloves. Why? The night is warm, why wear so much clothes? He comes over to
    me, I cannot see his eyes. He is breathing heavily from the exertion, sweat
    is dropping from his brow. I speak: 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     The punk started gibbering at me. I could barely make out the words
    - he had some kind of accent. If he was an illegal, it might put a crimp in
    my plans. The cops wouldn't put much effort into investigating the murder
    of an illegal alien, and the whole point of this was to make sure they
    investigate the crime. 
     | 
    
     "Are you mad? What does it mean?" 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I figured I'd just have to make the murder grisly enough that they'd
    HAVE to investigate it, and the thought brought a slow smile to my face. 
     | 
    
     He smiles, but he doesn't answer. I can see he is
    satisfied. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Gary, please, what..." he said. I interrupted "I'm
    not Gary." He gabbled something else, but I didn't pay attention. I
    was trying to figure out what nationality he might be and how that might
    affect the evening's plan.  
     | 
    
     "Gary, please, what..." 
    He interrupts me. 
    "I am not Gary." 
    How is it possible? What... 
    "What are you doing, what does it mean?" 
    No answer. He is smiling. He asks: 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "You Mexican?" I asked him. Of course not. His accent
    wasn't Spanish, it was something else. 
     | 
    
     "Are you Mexican?" Mexican? Sometimes
    they think I am Mexican, but I'm not a chicano. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "No, I'm Italian," he answered. Once he said it, I
    realized that was exactly what he looked like. Mediterranean skin, dark
    curly hair... he had to be either Italian or Greek. I gave him the
    once-over - he was actually pretty good-looking, no surprise given Gary's
    tastes, and I found myself enjoying the prospect of what was to come a
    little more. Up till now, it had been all work: planning the course of
    events down to the smallest detail. This was the first glimmer I had that,
    now that the moment had finally come, I could actually have a little fun in
    the process. 
     | 
    
     "No, I'm Italian. But..." 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "What's your real name?" I asked him. "Fred" was
    the handle Gary knew him by, but that had to be a fake. No doubt he was
    actually called Armando or Nicodemio or some
    other vowel-heavy, polysyllabic appellation. Not that I cared, of course.
    But I wasn't quite ready to dive into the night's work yet. A little
    chit-chat helped to prolong that delicious moment of anticipation, that
    moment of teetering on the edge of a cliff, when the fantasy of what is to
    come is still just a fantasy, ripe with potential and possibility. Soon
    enough, the blood would start to flow and the shimmering fantasy would
    become brutal, rank reality. Why not let the moment linger? 
     | 
    
     He doesn't answer. Another question: "What's
    your name?" 
    He knows very well my name is Fred, he called me
    so when we met. What does he want? 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Fred," he answered. It took me a moment to figure out
    what he said - it sounded more like "fid-DED-da"
    than "Fred". 
    So that's the way you want to play it, "Fred". Fine. And
    I'm Mother Teresa. 
    I could see in his eyes that he had no idea yet how badly his
    evening had veered off course. He had been hurt and surprised, yes, but was
    still basically unharmed. He probably thought he was in for some rough sex,
    maybe a little smacky-face, then it would all be
    over and he'd go back to his drab little life. 
    I hadn't been planning to fill the victim in on the details of what
    would be happening to him - after all, this story was about Gary, not
    "Fred". But something prompted me to fill him in on the details,
    however pointless it was to do so. 
     | 
    
     I tell him: "Fred." 
    I look at him. I don't understand. Is he going to
    explain? What does he want from me? 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Listen, 'Fred', I've got nothing against you, personally, but
    you are going to be my instrument of revenge tonight." 
     | 
    
     "Listen, Fred, I have nothing against you,
    but you are the instrument of a little revenge." 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I walked close to him and pulled his shirt open. Buttons popped off
    and flew around the room - what a satisfying feeling! His chest lay
    exposed, covered in dark fur and heaving with his ragged breathing. I could
    certainly see why Gary would choose this guy to hook up with. 
     | 
    
     He doesn't say anything else. He approaches. He
    grabs my shirt and rips it open, exposing my chest. He nods, he seems to be
    satisfied. 
    I am sweating. I am afraid. What does he want? A
    revenge. 
    Not against me. Against whom? Gary? 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     He gabbled something else. I shrugged my shoulders, having no clue
    what he was talking about. To shut him up, I grabbed hold of his chin and
    turned his face toward mine. The smell of fear was rising from his skin. I
    inhaled deeply. 
     | 
    
     "Listen, I don't know Gary, I am not his
    friend." 
    Stupid thing to say. Of course I don't know Gary,
    I wouldn't have called him Gary! He shrugs his shoulders. 
    He grabs my chin and looks at me. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "You're a fine specimen of young buck," I told him, my
    eyes locked with his. "It will be a pleasure to slaughter you." 
     | 
    
     "A very nice specimen of young man. It will
    be a pleasure to slaughter you..." 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Damn, was that a mistake. The punk reacted far faster than I
    expected him to, bringing his knee up into my crotch. I doubled over and
    felt his foot slam into my face on its way down. I fell backward and lay on
    the floor a bit, watching the stars swim in front of my eyes. Adrenalin
    surged in my blood, the old fight-or-flight reflex kicking in. But I forced
    emotion down - the punk wasn't going anywhere. And I had all night in front
    of me... 
    I stood up and wiped a trickle of blood off my upper lip. I
    considered delivering some kind of flip one-liner, a bon mot along the
    lines of "you'll pay for that" or "that was the last face
    you'll ever kick". But I didn't say anything. Direct confrontation is
    not my style. 
    Besides, actions speak louder than words. 
     | 
    
     A wave of panic seizes me. I react. I give him a
    blow in his crotch with my knee. He withdraws and doubles. I give him a
    well-aimed kick at his face. Thrust back with the force of the blow, he
    falls. I desperately try to free myself, but it is useless. It is stupid.
    It was a stupid thing to do. 
    I look at him. He is rising. Blood is running from
    his nose. He smiles. Not a friendly smile. My stomach flutters. I made a
    mistake, it was the panic. 
    Shit! Shit! Shit! 
    I squeeze my eyes shut. Then I open them. It is a
    joke, it must be a joke. But I know it is not. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     The punk fought me every step of the way, but I eventually got his
    legs roped together. It was a fun little ballet we performed, he and I - I
    would try to get the rope wrapped around his legs without coming close
    enough to leave myself vulnerable to another kick; he would try to slip out
    of the rope before I could tighten it enough to trap him. He was hampered,
    of course, by the fact that he couldn't move away from the spot where he
    was standing, nor use his hands to balance himself as we stepped and kicked
    our way through our little pas-de-deux. Several
    times, he lost his balance and got himself jerked up by the chain before he
    could get his feet safely back under him again. 
     | 
    
     A rope? Why does he have a rope in his hands? He
    has already handcuffed me. He is kneeling... he wants to rope my legs. It
    won't be so easy, you son-of bitch! 
    I try to give him a well aimed kick, but I cannot
    take him off guard. Of course, he is not stupid, he knows very well that
    I'll try to stop him. I try again, but he is quicker and the rope is around
    my left leg. I manage to slip out of it, but he doesn't give it up. I never
    succeed in hitting him and suddenly I lose my balance and I fall. I cannot
    fall, the chain around my neck jerks me up. I remain breathless and he
    tries again. 
    It is useless, but it's my last chance. Do I have
    a chance? No, I know I haven't any. I try again to fight, but this
    son-of-bitch can move quickly. I fall again and again and every time the
    chain stops my breath. It's a strange feeling, every time. A strange
    feeling, a strong feeling. Painful, but I feel something stirring inside. 
    Soon, very soon, I am sweating from exertion and
    fear. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Soon enough, though, I had a rope wrapped around his legs just above
    the knees, and another one fastening his ankles together, and his struggles
    stopped. I came close then and we stared at each other, breathing each
    other's breath and gazing into each others' eyes. Oh, how he hated me, that
    much was clear. He gathered a wad to spit at me, and I let him, picking up
    the flapping edge of his shirt and wiping the glop off my face with it. 
     | 
    
     The last time I fall, I discover I cannot move my
    legs anymore: he has managed to rope them. It's useless to struggle, now.
    It has been useless from the beginning. Now it's the end. He is
    approaching. I hate him I hate his smile, I hate his freedom of movement. 
    He is looking me in my eyes, he is so near I could
    kiss him, but I don't want to kiss him, I would like to bite him... it's a
    stupid idea. I hate him, I hate his grey eyes staring at me. 
    I spit on his face. He wipes himself with my
    shirt. I would like to kick him again, but it is not possible. I am in his
    power. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I spoke then, my voice soft and low. "I really wish I had the
    time to do you right," I told him. "I'm very skilled at this, you
    know. I could make you suffer for weeks. Months. I would start you out
    slowly, oh so slowly. Then bit by bit, increase the pain, day by day,
    cranking up your suffering and dialing it back
    again, each time taking you higher and higher until your mind was utterly
    lost in the torment. Only then would I grant you release. 
     | 
    
     "I really wish I had the time to do you
    right, I'm very skilled at this, you know. I could make you suffer for
    weeks. Months."  
    I feel a shudder of fear. But there is something,
    something I cannot describe, in his voice. It's mesmerizing. I imagine his
    strong hands over my body, I... 
    "I would start you out slowly, oh so slowly.
    Then bit by bit, increase the pain, day by day, cranking up your suffering
    and dialing it back again, each time taking you
    higher and higher until your mind was utterly lost in the torment." 
    He could do it, I know. He is not joking. This is
    not a play. I shudder, but there isn't only fear. I am almost fascinated.
    It's senseless... I cannot understand it, what's happening to me? Why do
    his words have such a strong power? 
    "Only then would I grant you release." 
    Release means death and I can see, as it were in
    front of me, the image of my corpse. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "I wish I could do that," I said, "but I just don't
    have the time. I only have a few hours to torture you to death, then plant
    the evidence that will lead the police straight to Gary." 
     | 
    
     He adds something about his revenge against Gary,
    but I don't hear anymore. 
    He has said "Torture you to death". He
    wasn't joking when he spoke about slaughtering me. Like in these stories I
    read on Greasetank. Snuff stories. 
    I am going to die. To die. Because of Gary. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Why Gary?" he said. I said nothing. "Why me?"
    he asked. "I do nothing to you." 
     | 
    
     "Why Gary?" 
    The question is absurd, but it came to my lips and
    I uttered it. And I add, perfectly conscious that it is nonsense:  
    "Why me? I do nothing to you." 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I broke away from him then and walked over to my supply area. I
    heard the clink of the chain behind me as he thrashed uselessly again. 
     | 
    
     He doesn't answer. He turns and walks to a corner
    where there is a table. There are two large bags on it. 
    I try to move, but is useless. I am afraid, but I
    feel aroused, too: my cock is stiffening and this is very strange. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "You ever been fishing, Fred?" I asked. If he answered, I
    didn't hear it. No matter. I dug around on the table for the items I was
    looking for. "When you put a chunk of bait on your line and drop it
    into the water, do you actually care which particular fish bites your hook?
    No, you don't. Except for size, one bass is just like any other bass, one
    trout is just like all the rest." 
     | 
    
     "You ever been fishing, Fred?" 
    What a stupid question! 
    He goes on: 
    "When you put a chunk of bait on your line
    and drop it into the water, do you actually care which particular fish
    bites your hook?" For him I am just the fish he was looking for. He is
    mad. And I am in danger. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I picked up one of the small blades from the table and tucked it
    into my pocket, out of his view. Then I found the thick, black hood and
    turned back toward my captive. He saw it and flinched, but of course there
    was nowhere he could go. I crossed back over to him and began working the
    leather over his head. He struggled, uselessly. "You're my fish, Fred.
    If it hadn't been you, it would have been somebody else just like you. To
    me, you're all the same." 
    He probably thought that was a racist comment: "all you
    foreigners look alike to me". I wondered if he'd realize that I
    actually meant everyone in the entire world. All those busy little beings,
    swarming around, scrambling and scraping to get dollars and euros and rupees and yuan,
    then racing just as quickly to spend them. All of them different in the
    meaningless particulars of their lives, but all the same by the only
    measurement that mattered: none of them were me. It seemed like too fine a
    philosophical point to debate with him, so I let him think what he wanted. 
     | 
    
     He is coming back. He has something in his hand,
    what... A hood! Shit! 
    He approaches, he begins to slip the leather hood
    on my head. I move my head, I try to struggle, but I cannot defend myself,
    not with a chain around my neck, the rope and the handcuffs. I am
    completely blind, now. 
    "You're my fish, Fred. If it hadn't been you,
    it would have been somebody else just like you. To me, you're all the
    same." 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I snugged the hood into place and buckled
    the straps to hold it in place. It had thick padding over the mouth, an
    opening at the nose to breathe through, and tiny dots for the eyes. It
    would allow him to see just enough of what was going on to frighten and
    frustrate him, and it would muffle any shouts he would make to a manageable
    volume without completely cutting off his ability to form words. 
     | 
    
     Now that the hood is in its place, I discover that
    it has two holes for the eyes: I can see something, but only something. Now
    he is buckling the straps of the hood. There is a padding at the mouth: I
    cannot breathe with my mouth, only with the nose. His voice seems lower,
    now, I cannot hear well. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I thought of an inspired ending to my fish metaphor as I slid the
    blade out of my pocket and silently folded it open down where he couldn't
    see it. "The point is, no matter what the fish looks like when you
    catch it, it ends up just like all the rest: gutted and filleted." I
    raised the knife up to his exposed chest and drew a thin red line across
    the top of one well-muscled pec. 
     | 
    
     "The point is, no matter what the fish looks
    like when you catch it, it ends up just like all the rest: gutted and
    filleted." 
    He said "gutted". And again I see this
    man, a knife in his hand, opening my belly. A wave of fear overcomes me,
    but my cock is almost fully rigid, now. I hope he doesn't notice it. I try
    to pull my body in. 
    It's senseless. He wants to kill me and I have a hardon. He is a killer and I don't want him knowing
    that... 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     He squirmed and squawked, as I expected he would. I loved the way he
    tried to writhe away from my blade. He had enough freedom of movement to
    wiggle around, but not enough to get away. He knew all his efforts were
    doomed from the start, but it was unthinkable that he would just stand
    there and let me cut him. No, his body's instinct for survival and desire to
    avoid pain forced him to struggle, however useless his mind knew his
    struggles were. 
     | 
    
     "Aaaah!" It
    was a burning, like a flame, on my chest, on the left side. I cannot see
    his hands. Does he have a candle, a match? 
    I bend my head, trying to see better. It is not a
    candle, it's a knife. A chill runs through my back. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     It was while I was making the second cut that I noticed the large
    white elephant in the room, which I had somehow missed up until that point.
    "Fred's" struggles brought his pelvic area into contact with my
    thigh, and, even though it should have been obvious what it was,
    nevertheless my first thought was "what, does he have a flashlight in
    his pocket?" I absolutely was not expecting that he would have
    developed an erection, given what I was in the middle of doing to him. 
     | 
    
     He is moving his hand, he is going to cut again. I
    feel the burning a second time, on the right side, but this time I don't
    shout. I remain silent. I don't want to see him delighted. I shut my mouth.
    I won't yell anymore. I brace myself. I'll give him no satisfaction. 
    Now I feel the point of the blade against my left
    tit. Is he going to cut through it? Not now, later perhaps, now this son of
    bitch is just playing, like a cat with a mouse. I am a mouse in a trap, I
    am a prisoner and he is my gaoler and my executioner. I am going to die,
    but my cock rears up. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     And yet, there it was. I stopped cutting in mid-slice, leaving only
    a tiny trickle of blood dripping down each side of his chest. I then turned
    my knife lower. He jumped, but all I was after were his clothes. Cutting
    through clothing is awkward work. They make it look easy in the movies, but
    in real life it's impossible to do gracefully. It's even less elegant when
    the clothing is tied tightly to the body that's wearing it. But this was
    not the movies, and I had no audience to impress, so I fumbled my way
    through, and soon enough, I had worked the last bits of fabric off his
    body, leaving him standing naked, wearing only his ropes and chains. 
     | 
    
     And suddenly I see the blade of his knife against
    my hard cock. Shit! 
    Not my cock, not this. I am going to die, but not
    so! I try to avoid it, but it is senseless, I can hardly move. 
    The blade is cutting my trousers. What is he going
    to do? What is there now, in that sick brain? 
    Then I understand, he is stripping me naked, this
    son of bitch. OK, faggot, if you want to se me
    naked, here am I, with a large cock ready to use. Do you want to taste it?
    In your mouth or in your ass, as you like. I am ready. I am going to die,
    but I am ready. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     He was glaring defiantly at me through the pinhole eyes in the hood.
    The impossible-to-hide erection was jutting forward from his bound legs,
    poking stiffly into the air between us. 
     | 
    
     I look at him. What are you going to do, you, bag
    of shit? Suck my cock! 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "You sick creature," I told him. "I cannot believe
    that you are actually getting off on this." This was not in the plan
    at all. 
     | 
    
     He speaks: "You sick creature, I cannot
    believe that you are actually getting off on this." 
    I could laugh. He calls me "sick
    creature" He! He is mad, completely mad, but I already knew it. He is
    going to kill me just to amuse himself, but I am sick. I never met such a
    son of bitch, such a rabid dog. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "You call me the sick one," he replied in slow, muffled
    words. "You are the one tying me, you are the one cutting me. YOU are
    the sick fuck here!" 
    He had a point, I guess. Still... it completely destroyed the mood
    for me. When I torture a man, dammit, he's not
    supposed to ENJOY it! 
     | 
    
     I say: "You call me the sick one, you are the
    one tying me, you are the one cutting me. YOU are the sick fuck here!" 
    He seems taken off balance, but it's only a
    moment. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Look," I said, "give me a little credit, OK? I know
    what I'm talking about. You're not the first over-muscled, mush-brained
    meathead I've taken down, you know. In fact, you're the fifth. And up until
    now, not a single one of them - not one - has popped a woody in the
    process. Just you. So what does that make you, some kind of
    hyper-masochistic freak? Some kind of self-loathing myrmidon who gets
    turned on by the fact that he's about to be tortured to death?" 
     | 
    
     "Look, give me a little credit, OK? I know
    what I'm talking about." 
    He says I am not the first stud he has killed.
    "In fact, you're the fifth." 
    I shudder. I thought that perhaps he could change
    his mind. I hoped, it was a faint hope, but now I know that it is really
    the end. He has already killed, he is a murderer, a bloody, sick murderer! 
    He goes on: "And up until now, not a single
    one of them - not one - has popped a woody in the process. Just you. So
    what does that make you, some kind of hyper-masochistic freak? Some kind of
    self-loathing myrmidon who gets turned on by the fact that he's about to be
    tortured to death?" 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     No answer. Perhaps I had exceeded the myrmidon's vocabulary. 
     | 
    
     I don't understand exactly what he is saying.
    What's a myrmidon? I cannot hear well and he doesn't try to speak plain
    words. I hate him. I should like to spit on his face, but I cannot. And
    everything is useless. I hate him, I never hated anyone so much... I would
    be happy to die if only I could destroy him. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I stomped back and forth for a while, trying to decide what to do
    next. My first impulse was to go with the plan, and just crank up the
    intensity a bit. Surely some serious pain would knock the wind out of the
    punk's sails. And yet, every time I looked over at him, there he stood,
    bound, gagged, and hooded, chained by the neck to the ceiling, his own
    blood drying on his chest... and with his unbending flagpole still pointing
    due north. 
    I'd never worked on a masochist before. The thought was repugnant.
    It took any hint of pleasure out of what I was doing. But how to proceed? I
    couldn't let the jerk go, but the thought of working my magic to the sounds
    of "more! more!" instead of "stop! stop!" was so
    off-putting. 
    But time was limited, and a decision had to be made, and so I made
    one. There is, after all, one effective way of taking the wood out of a
    woody. Aside from just slicing it off, of course, which would have
    necessitated changes to certain later parts of my plan. 
     | 
    
     He is hesitating. He is certainly thinking about
    the next torture. Or does he want to fuck me? Or to be fucked? Ready,
    mister, I am ready to face fuck you or to open your ass and fill your
    innards with my cum. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "OK, Fred," I said. "There's been a slight change of
    plan. You're going to get one last orgasm." Draining his spunk should
    help in two ways, both softening his dick and reducing his endurance for
    later pain. 
     | 
    
     "OK, Fred, there's been a slight change of
    plan. You're going to get one last orgasm." 
    Yes, it is like I thought, he wants to be fucked..
    I like the idea of fucking him, it's good, fucking my killer. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     He mumbled something back that I couldn't make out through the hood.
    I went over to my supply shelf and brought back a length of rope and a
    five-pound weight. I went back and grabbed his ball sac, working it out
    from between his thighs. I wrapped the rope around the base of his balls,
    then tied the other end to the weight. I let the weight drop, not too far,
    but enough to make him grunt. After that, his dick, which hadn't softened a
    bit, no longer jutted upward but instead pointed somewhere south of
    horizontal. 
     | 
    
     "You are just an asshole!" 
    But he doesn't answer, perhaps he didn't hear me,
    it's difficult to speak with this hood. 
    He goes to the large bag and takes a rope and a...
    what's this? Iron. I don't understand. Is he going to push that thing into
    my ass?  
    Hey! He grabs my nuts. What is he going to do? He
    is wrapping the rope around them and then... He is attaching the piece of
    iron to the rope. Balls-torture. I tried it, sometimes. I like it, but
    now...  
    He is looking at me, now, he is smiling and he
    lets the iron drop.  
    Argh! Painful, but I can bear it.  
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I grabbed his dick and started jacking it. It was clear that Fred
    didn't want to be enjoying himself in his current circumstances, but his
    body was betraying him. A few minutes in and his hips were pumping and
    thrusting in time with my rhythm, even though his motions caused the dangling
    weight to swing and bob and bang into his legs. I took a break to slather
    some cream on my hand, then started stroking again. The cream brought his
    sensation level to new peaks, and I could tell he was getting close. 
     | 
    
     He grabs my dick. Hand-job, so? He hasn't the gut
    to take it into his ass or mouth, but he wants to feel it. Such a stupid
    faggot. 
    But I like the feeling of his hand around my cock,
    he is good at it. He certainly likes doing it. And the feeling is great,
    really great. I hate to show him that I am pleasing myself, but the feeling
    is too strong and the pleasure is going up and up, in waves that are rising
    from my cock and balls.. I begin to move my ass and I feel the iron
    stretching my nuts. It's good, it's really good. I like the pain in my nuts
    and the feeling of his warm hand around my cock. 
    He stops. Why? Was it just to tease me? He is
    putting some cream on his hand and... he goes on! 
    Great, really a great feeling. You are mad,
    completely mad, but you know how to do a handjob. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Another minute, and he was going over the edge, spraying thick white
    drops all over the floor. Which, come to think of it, would provide some
    nice extra evidence for the cops to sift through. I jacked him a few more
    times, then stepped back and waited for him come down from his high and
    notice me. When he did, I said "You liked that?" 
     | 
    
     And then it is too strong, from my nuts the
    pleasure goes on whirling through my cock and fills my body in a large
    wave. I close my eyes. I see soldiers running, a large red cock, a dark
    ass, naked powerful men, I see images floating. I am so well, so far from
    this room. 
    But his voice, his bloody voice, calls me back:
    "You liked that?" 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     He grunted a response. 
     | 
    
     I answer: "You are good at this, this is what
    you should do. You could earn money in this way." But he doesn't hear
    me. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Well," I said, "I hope it was enjoyable, because
    that was your last one." 
     | 
    
     "Well, I hope it was enjoyable, because that
    was your last one." 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I retrieved a C-clamp from my supply shelf and brought it over to
    his crotch. His cock was still twitching and drooling fluid from its tip.
    But it was definitely softening, which was the effect I had been seeking,
    and his balls were turning purple under the stretched skin. He began to
    whimper as he felt the touch of the cold metal. He made a half-hearted
    attempt to turn away from me, but he couldn't bear to swing the weight too
    wildly, so it was easy enough for me to slip the clamp into place around
    his left testicle and begin to tighten the screw. Round and round it went,
    steadily pushing the two cups of the clamp together, with his left nut
    trapped between them. 
     | 
    
     He is going back to his bag. What's next? What is
    he planning, this mad man? 
    He has taken something, it seems a vice. What's
    next, what's he doing? 
    He takes my nuts in his hands and I can feel the
    vice against them. I shudder. I begin to sweat. A wave of panic seizes me.
    I try to avoid it, but the iron attached to my nuts is heavy and every
    movement is an agony of pain. What can I do? What can I do? 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Testicles are such wonderful organs, so sensitive, and yet so
    sturdy. The slightest squeeze causes their owner such pain, and yet it is
    possible to compress a testicle to a thickness of only a quarter of an inch
    and still have it rebound perfectly unscathed, if a bit tender. 
    I was going to compress it a bit smaller than that. 
     | 
    
     He begins to tighten the vice. I am sweating
    profusely now, I cannot manage to restrain myself. The pain is increasing.
    I howl. My heart is pounding in my chest. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Fred began to thrash and shout as I cranked the clamp tighter and
    tighter. I took a break to let him savor the
    sensation while I admired the view. There was perhaps half an inch between
    the two halves of the clamp. The skin of his scrotum was stretched out over
    his deformed ball, which was being squeezed out on every side around the
    two cups. I could only imagine the torment my little Freddy-boy was
    feeling. Poor slob. 
     | 
    
     I try to free myself, even if I know it is not
    possible, I want to escape from the increasing pain. I shout, but there is
    no escape, I am lost. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I reached in and gave the handle another half turn. Fred jumped and
    grunted into the hood. He so desperately wanted to get his hands around to
    his front side to protect his poor, vulnerable nuts, but the cuffs just
    wouldn't let him. It didn't stop him from yanking and pulling at them,
    twisting his body uselessly around. There was no escaping the clamp, which
    stuck to him no matter which way he turned. By now his dick had gone
    completely soft. At last. 
     | 
    
     The pain is boiling up from my nut, stronger every
    time he tightens the vice. I cannot bear it anymore, I cannot. Please,
    don't, don't! 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Another crank of the screw, another shout from Fred. His ball was
    now being squashed flatter than one would think was possible, and yet if I
    were to release the clamp now, it would be just fine. A little bit sore,
    but otherwise whole and intact. 
    Time to crank it harder, then. 
     | 
    
     I am sweating, like a pig. I believe I am going to
    pass out. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Fred was having trouble breathing now, not because of the hood, but
    because of the incredible pain his nut was telegraphing up his spine to his
    brain. He had stopped moving around, probably because every movement only
    made his agony worse. I was moving the handle in tiny increments now, less
    than a quarter of a turn. The skin had turned completely purple, and his
    testicle was almost unrecognizable as such. We had reached the quarter-inch
    point for sure. Nuts may be resilient, but they're not indestructible, and
    his was fast approaching the point of no return. 
     | 
    
     I feel the pressure increasing and then... 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I started to give it another quarter turn, and had only gone halfway
    when suddenly there was no resistance. Fred screamed a long, high-pitched
    moan and began to jump and thrash again. I held on and finished cranking
    the clamp the rest of the way closed. The only thing between the two cups
    of the clamp now were skin and a few bits of mushed-up
    meat that used to be a testicle. 
     | 
    
     I scream and the world seems to fade, I cannot see
    anymore, there is only pain, pain pulsing in my head, pain raging in my
    nut, pain surging, from my nut, to every part of my body. A sea of pain and
    I am drowning in the pain. I grunt and I gulp for air. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Fred was going wild. The way he pulled on that neck chain I thought
    I was going to have to go in and stop him from hanging himself, but he
    never quite got to the point where he needed rescuing. I let him go for a
    while until finally his panic had faded a bit. When he was a little calmer
    I reached in and undid the clamp. It only took a few turns before the skin
    slipped out from between the cups. When it did, the rope around the base of
    his sac suddenly found itself with only one nut holding it in place instead
    of two. Under the pull of the weight, it slipped right off around his
    remaining ball, which elicited another yelp from Fred. 
     | 
    
     I shudder. It's cold, suddenly it's cold, but I am
    sweating. 
    He takes the iron away and he yanks my cock. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I kicked the weight away, then yanked on Fred's shriveled
    cock a few times. "Not so stiff now, it seems," I said. All I got
    in reply was a muffled groan. 
     | 
    
     "Not so stiff now, it seems." 
    I can see the evil leer in his face. I hate him. 
    "Shit!" 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     For the next part of the evening's entertainment, I had planned a strappado. This is the sort of game you just can't play
    in a consensual S&M scene, where the victim is supposed to be able to
    get up and walk away undamaged after the scene is over. To do a strappado right, you really need to dislocate the
    victim's shoulders, completely ripping his arms out of their sockets until
    the ligaments connecting bone to bone are torn apart and the only things
    keeping his arms attached to his body are his overstretched muscles and
    some skin. This technique was a favorite of the
    Spanish Inquisition back when they were a serious force, a far cry from
    today when they are little more than joke fodder for irreverent goofballs
    like Monty Python. I had never tried one before, and was curious to see how
    it would play out. 
     | 
    
     I begin to breathe again, but the pain is so
    strong! 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I got the supplies I would need, then began wrapping rope around
    Fred's wrists. The cuffs would have made for a more painful suspension for
    him, but I didn't want to risk having his hand slip out of the metal
    bracelet. When I had tied them firmly together, wrist to wrist with only a
    little slack between them, I removed the cuffs. He flexed his hands,
    testing his new bonds, but didn't say anything. 
     | 
    
     This son of bitch is planning something else. His
    sick mind never stops. He has a rope, now. I cannot move. What does he need
    a rope for? 
    I can feel the rope around my wrists. Why? I am
    already cuffed. He is removing the cuffs, now, but my situation doesn't
    improve, the rope blocks every movement. I look at the son of bitch. I
    should like to kill him, but he'll kill me, I know it. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     The setup had been tough to work out. It had to be both sturdy and
    portable, since I couldn't very well leave my equipment sitting around
    while dance classes were being taught. I wanted to use a mechanized winch,
    but there weren't any convenient attachment points that were strong enough
    for my needs. So I had to make my own. I drilled five holes in the smooth
    hardwood floor while Fred watched me. His stare kept making me feel
    self-conscious, so a couple of times I held the drill up and made
    threatening motions at him with it. That was just to scare him, though. 
     | 
    
     Then he begins to drill holes in the floor. What's
    this crap? What's this crap? 
    He is aware I am looking at him and he takes the
    drill and moves towards me. A wave of fear overwhelms me, but he is joking,
    this bloody pig, this madman, this son of bitch is just playing, he is
    amusing himself. He is completely kinky. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     One of the holes I fixed a ring bolt into, strong and sturdy The
    other four I used to bolt the winch in place. I stretched its power cord
    over to a wall outlet, then used a ladder to reach up to the metal ceiling
    rafters and attach a pulley to one of them. This thing was rated to 2,000
    pounds, which ought to be enough to support the load it would need to hold.
    Over the pulley went a rope, thicker and stronger than the ones I had used
    up till now. One end I hooked to the short length connecting Fred's wrists
    behind his back; the other end I fed into the winch. 
     | 
    
     I don't understand what he is doing. There is a
    rope, a ring, he is fixing the rope to the floor. What is he planning? I'll
    discover it soon, very soon, I know. I hate him, I hate him, I would give
    my life to kill him, to see him dead. 
    But he'll kill me. 
    He takes a ladder, now. He is attaching something,
    it seems to be a pulley, to the ceiling. What is he planning? What's inside
    that sick brain? 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "OK, Fred," I said. "Show time." 
     | 
    
     "OK, Fred, show time." 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I turned on the winch. It began to turn, slowly taking up the slack
    in the rope. When most of the slack was gone, I turned the winch off and
    went over to remove the chain from around Fred's neck and the ropes from
    around his legs. He was now free to move around, but only within a circle
    perhaps two paces across before he was stopped by the rope connecting his
    hands to the ceiling. He used the opportunity to strike up a conversation. 
     | 
    
     He takes the chain off my neck and the rope off my
    legs. I can move a little, but only a little. This son of bitch is free.
    But they'll catch him, he'll spend his life in jail. Yes, I am sure. He
    cannot go on killing men for his pleasure. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "You know they will catch you for this," he said.
    "You will spend the rest of your life in jail." 
     | 
    
     "You know they will catch you for this, you
    will spend the rest of your life in jail." 
    Why did I tell him this? It's senseless, but I
    hate him, I hate him. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     He was so earnest and yet so pathetic that I had to laugh, long and
    hard. When I could speak again I said "Fred, weren't you listening? I
    already told you I've done this four times before. It's the same pattern
    each time: I pick someone I don't like, then find a way to frame him for a
    gruesome murder." 
     | 
    
     He is laughing, now, this dirty pig is laughing,
    showing his teeth. 
    "Fred, weren't you listening? I already told
    you I've done this four times before. It's the same pattern each time: I
    pick someone I don't like, then find a way to frame him for a gruesome
    murder." 
    He cannot escape, he cannot kill me and remain
    free, he cannot. The police must catch him, they'll certainly catch him and
    send him to a madhouse. I shout: 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "It is not possible," he said. 
     | 
    
     "It is not possible." 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Dammit, it IS possible," I
    said. He was making me angry - not good. Angry people make stupid mistakes.
    I started up the winch again and pulled out all the slack in the rope. He
    was forced to stand directly under the pulley, bent over with his wrists at
    about the height of his shoulders. "It worked four times before, and
    it's going to work this time, too." 
     | 
    
     "Dammit, it IS
    possible!" 
    He begins to pull the rope and to lift my wrists
    behind my back. He forces me to bend. 
    "It worked four times before, and it's going
    to work this time, too." 
    He is nervous, he begins to be afraid. I answer,
    but it is not easy, it's difficult to breathe in this position. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "The police, they are very smart in this country," he
    continued. "They have ways of figure out what really happened at a
    crime." He had to take several breaths to get all the words out, bent
    over as he was. I cranked him up a few more inches until he had to stand on
    his toes. 
     | 
    
     "The police, they are very smart in this
    country. They have ways of figure out what really happened at a
    crime." 
    He pulls the rope and I am almost lifted. I stay
    on my toes. The strain in my arms and elbows is painful. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "You watch too much TV," I said. "Sure, on CSI they
    do that stuff, but mostly, cops don't care. Who are you, anyway, some
    burger-flipping nobody? Will anyone even notice that you're gone? Unless
    your last name is Corleone, I seriously doubt
    it." I winched him up another inch or two. He didn't answer this time,
    probably too focused on keeping his breathing going. Now I was back in
    control of the situation. 
     | 
    
     "You watch too much TV." He is sure
    nobody will look for me. My father will, certainly, even if we lose contact
    some time ago. "Will anyone even notice that you're gone? Unless your
    last name is Corleone, I seriously doubt
    it." 
    The rope, the rope is stretching my arms. It's
    painful. And it's hard to breathe. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Look," I said, "Gary is back at his place." He
    tells me Gary wouldn't care for me. I would prefer Gary's indifference to
    this son-of-a-bitch's attention! "All he wanted from you was a good
    fuck." 
     | 
    
     "Look, Gary is back at his place fuming about
    how the battery in his car died. He might try to e-mail you or IM you to
    tell you he couldn't make your date tonight, but honestly, I doubt it. He's
    just not that concerned about you. All he wanted from you was a good
    fuck." 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Now was as good a time as any to plant some evidence. I went over to
    the supply shelf and got some. I held it under Fred's bent head to show him
    - bits of skin and hair extracted from Gary's car. I began to liberally
    sprinkle it around the area, making sure to rub some on Fred. 
     | 
    
     And now, what is he doing? He is taking something
    from that bloody bag, little bits of... of what? I cannot see. He throws
    them around me. He is mad, as mad as a cow. He rubs them on my head, on my
    belly. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "I think what Gary most likely did was get someone to jump his
    battery for him, then go out and drive a while to charge it up. By now,
    he's probably back home, feeling grumpy. When he gets grumpy, he usually
    drinks a couple of beers and falls asleep in front of the TV set." 
     | 
    
     "I think what Gary most likely did was get
    someone to jump his battery for him, then go out and drive a while to
    charge it up. By now, he's probably back home, feeling grumpy. When he gets
    grumpy, he usually drinks a couple of beers and falls asleep in front of
    the TV set." 
    He knows Gary very well. Is he his lover? Or was
    he his lover? He wants to revenge himself because Gary doesn't like him
    anymore? Is this the reason? 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "How do you know so much about him?" Fred said from
    between clenched teeth. 
     | 
    
     "How do you know so much about him?" 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Because I live in the apartment next to his, and the wall
    between us is thin," I said. "Believe me, I've studied our boy
    Gary for a good long while. You know, in a way, there's a silver lining to
    what is happening to you tonight. You wouldn't have liked Gary very much if
    you had met him. He's not a nice person. He would have fucked you, then dumped
    you and never seen you again. He's the kind of guy who can't even be
    bothered to reach around and give you a hand job while he's got his dick in
    your ass." 
     | 
    
     "Because I live in the apartment next to his,
    and the wall between us is thin." 
    He is Gary's neighbour! If only I could leave a
    message, they would catch him. I won't be here to see his face when the
    police will catch him, but... it would be gorgeous. 
    "Believe me, I've studied our boy Gary for a
    good long while. You know, in a way, there's a silver lining to what is
    happening to you tonight. You wouldn't have liked Gary very much if you had
    met him. He's not a nice person. He would have fucked you, then dumped you
    and never seen you again. He's the kind of guy who can't even be bothered
    to reach around and give you a hand job while he's got his dick in your
    ass." 
    "Believe me, I've studied our boy Gary for a
    good long while." He tells me I wouldn't have liked Gary! Certainly,
    it's far better to meet a kinky murderer! "He's not a nice
    person." And what do you think you are, you, bloody bastard? Son of
    bitch! Does he think that I like him? 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I finished salting the place with Gary's DNA, then cranked up the
    winch a bit higher until Fred's toes just brushed the floor. I watched as
    his body slowly sagged down until he could bear some of his weight on his
    feet. It wasn't the rope stretching - it was his sinews. I decided to talk
    a while more to fill the time until he found a new equilibrium. 
     | 
    
     What is he doing? He pulls the rope and again the
    pain in my arms. I have to make an effort, but I manage to touch the floor.
    But my arms are stretching too much, it's really painful. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "It's going to be quite a shock to poor Gary when the police
    come to arrest him, armed with all sorts of evidence against him," I said.
    "His skin and hair at the scene of the crime. Your blood in his car.
    All carefully, but not carefully enough, cleaned up to make it look like he
    tried to hide his involvement but failed. The poor guy won't know what hit
    him. 
     | 
    
     "It's going to be quite a shock to poor Gary
    when the police come to arrest him, and there are a lot of proofs against
    him: skin, hair, blood. All carefully, but not carefully enough, cleaned up
    to make it look like he tried to hide his crime. The poor guy won't know
    what happened." 
    His skin and hair? So the fragments he rubbed over
    my body were Gary's hair and bits of skin. This son of bitch is really a
    snake, he is kinky, but he is clever. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "I know it's risky to do it, but I plan to be there to watch
    with all the other neighbors when the cops drag
    him out to the street. Maybe I'll cozy up to Mrs.
    Jablonski - she's always good for a long chat
    about the misfortunes of others. I can hear her now... 'I always knew there
    was something about that man!' She'll be in heaven going over the gruesome
    details of what that vicious cur did. How he crushed that poor boy's left
    nut and then wrenched his arms right out of their sockets. Oh! Which
    reminds me..." 
     | 
    
     "It's a risk, I know, but I want to see when
    the cops drag him out to the street" He adds something about a certain
    Mrs. Diabloski: "She'll say: 'I always knew
    there was something strange about that man!' She'll tell all the details of
    what that vicious madman did. How he crushed that poor boy's left nut and
    then wrenched his arms right out of their sockets." 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Now that Fred was stretched out as much as he could be, I winched
    him up until his toes were about a foot above the ground. Grunts and moans
    told me that he did not find this position very comfortable. I then did a
    complicated trick with another bit of rope, fastening it to the first one
    and to the ring bolt in the floor. Now, the winch could pull Fred's body
    higher, but he could never drop any lower than he was now - if I unrolled
    the winch, the other rope would hold his weight suspended at its current
    height. 
    And now it was time for the show to begin in earnest. 
     | 
    
     Wrenched his arms... Shit, this is what he is
    going to do! Shit! No, no, no! I am sweating, now 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I started fairly small. I took Fred up another foot, then released
    the winch to spin freely. Fred dropped until the bolt caught his weight,
    yanking him up hard by his wrists. He screamed. I let him hang there for a
    minute or so. 
     | 
    
     He is pulling the rope again. Suddenly I fall.
    It's only a little jump, but the pain is stunning. I scream. I scream. He
    looks at me, smiling. You, shit! Will he let me here, hanging down? My
    arms, my arms! Shit! 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Then I cranked him up again. Eighteen inches this time. I held him
    there a while, letting him wait for it, then again I let him drop, and
    again the bolt stopped him short of reaching the floor. Another scream. Oh,
    how I wished I could record this on video, to play over and over again! But
    it was too chancy. The way to survive when you have tastes like mine is to
    keep everything in your head. Physical evidence must be kept to a minimum,
    and must be destroyed when it has served its purpose. After taking care of
    business here, my first task on arriving home would be to dispose of my phreaking equipment. 
     | 
    
     Again, he pulls the rope, but when the rope lifts
    me, the pain is stronger, now, in my arms, in my elbows. Stop, stop! 
    He waits. He is enjoying himself. This kinky bag
    of shit. 
    I am sweating, the fear is grabbing my bowels. 
    He is going to drop me again, no, no! 
    I scream, the pain is stronger, I cannot bear it. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Two whole feet this time. Drop. Scream. I could tell by the change
    in pitch of the scream that something was different this time. I couldn't
    see any changes in the way his arms were positioned, but something must
    have torn inside him to cause that degree of agony. I let him dangle, then
    brought him up as high as I could take him, about six feet or so. 
     | 
    
     He is pulling, the pain in my elbows and arms is
    stunning. I... not again, not again! I cannot stand it! I cannot! 
    Argh. I scream in utter torment. I
    almost faint. It was... My mouth opens and I realise I am beginning to
    drool. 
    He is pulling again. Stop, please, stop! I cannot
    bear it, I cannot bear it, I... He is lifting me higher and higher, almost
    to the ceiling. No, God, don't. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I left him there, hanging by his wrists from the ceiling, every fiber of his being straining to ease the pain and yet
    utterly unable to find the smallest relief. I walked over to stand beneath
    him. He spun slowly in the air, legs pinwheeling
    helplessly beneath him. I could see now some dark red-purple blotches
    forming around his armpits - internal bleeding. I watched him in rapture,
    admiring all those powerful muscles of his, rendered impotent by a simple
    contraption of rope. This, THIS, was worth two years of work! I reached
    down to stroke my own boner through my pants. Not to climax, of course -
    got to keep the physical evidence to a minimum. 
     | 
    
     He leaves me here, the pain in my arms and elbows
    is unbearable, I cannot stand it, I cannot stand it... I can feel the
    strain of the pull of my weight in my arms and shoulders, and all across my
    chest. 
    I look at him. He is stroking his cock. It's hard.
    He is enjoying it, of course, he is happy to look at my agony. He has a
    boner. And he says I am the sick creature! This man is raving mad. I avert
    my eyes, I don't want to see him anymore. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Back to the winch. I waited until he was facing toward me. His eyes,
    peering through the pinholes in the hood, were locked on my hand as I held
    it hovering over the switch that would send him plunging toward the ground
    again. The pleading I could see there might have moved me at one time in my
    life. Not now, though. I faked a motion toward the switch once, twice, then
    on the third time hit it for real.  
     | 
    
     But I want to know what he is doing to do. I look
    at him again and I see he is going to make me fall again. No, I cannot bear
    it, No! He is doing it, no, he doesn't, he's only joking, he's playing with
    my pain, with my fear, my death. I hate him, as I never hated anyone in my
    life. 
    Again. NO! 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     He fell. 
     | 
    
     I fall. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     The six-foot drop was enough to finish the job. This time, when he
    hit bottom, it wasn't in a hunched, bent posture like before. This time, he
    kept falling until his arms stretched straight up over his head. They
    looked grotesquely long, and stuck out unnaturally far from his shoulders. There
    was no scream this time. I thought perhaps he might have passed out, but
    then saw that he was just in shock. I waited five, ten seconds, and then it
    came, a long, drawn-out, inhuman wail. 
     | 
    
     I writhe in pain, I am pain, only pain. I howl in
    anguish, the pain searing at my mind. 
    No, not again, not again. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     For good measure, I cranked him up to full height and let him drop
    again. That got another scream out of him. Then I released the rope from
    the ring bolt and used the winch to ease him down to the ground. He
    collapsed onto his side and quivered. I went over to him and untied the
    rope from his wrists. It had cut into him, leaving angry, bleeding welts.
    He was unable to move his arms at all, and just lay there with his eyes
    closed. 
     | 
    
     He pulls me up and I scream, I fall again and I
    scream. 
    I am on the floor, now, a shock wave of pain
    burning like fire through every fibre of my body. I am numb. I am only
    aware of the pain and the hatred for this kinky bastard. 
    I close my eyes. I am going to puke. 
    My mind wanders, I am far away, my mind shifts
    from the excruciating pain. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I let him lie there for a while, gabbling under his breath in what I
    assumed was Italian. His voice was a harsh rasp, drained of power by all
    his recent screaming. He was now capable of only a soft barking noise, and
    could make no sounds that might be heard outside this room. Having no need
    to muffle his voice any longer, I unbuckled the hood and took it off his
    head. 
    His thick black hair was matted down with sweat, and he stank of
    fear and hot leather. I lowered my face toward his and sniffed deeply, savoring the intoxicating scent. But as I did, my nose
    was assaulted a less pleasant smell, and I looked over to see a watery
    yellow stream running from his shrunken penis. Ick.
    Fortunately it was aimed away from me, but as the puddle expanded, it first
    touched and then soaked Fred's thighs and waist. 
    Freddy-boy seemed dazed, sleepy. I waited a bit longer to see if he
    would come around on his own, but as the minutes ticked by I began to get
    impatient. I retrieved my knife from my table to see if that might perk him
    up a bit. 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I slapped his face a few times. "Come on, Fred, break time's
    over. Wake up! Time to go on with the show." I kept calling in that
    vein while I used the knife to open up a line on his abdomen. Blood began
    to seep from the wound, but I hadn't cut deeply enough to allow him to
    bleed out on me. There was too much still to be done. 
     | 
    
     Then, slowly, I come back. I lie in agony, spent.
    I want to die, to end this torture. 
    I open my eyes. I realise I pissed myself. There
    is a large pool of piss. 
    He is approaching. He has his knife. 
    "A little break and then it is time to go on
    with the show. It's becoming late. And we have plenty of things to do, do
    you know it, little pig?" 
    He cuts. I feel the stabbing at my belly. I
    scream. 
    "Just to wake you up completely. You were a
    bit drowsy...." 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Finally I could see that he was all the way back. I thought about
    giving him a friendly punch in the shoulder but decided it might send him
    off to La-La-land again, so instead I just left him lying there while I set
    up the next phase of the evening's entertainment. 
     | 
    
     Blood is running from the wound, not a deep one,
    but painful. 
    And now he is disappearing again. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     There wasn't a huge amount of preparation to do, but I did want to
    give my gear a final trial run before hooking it up to Fred. I kept my eye
    on him, glancing over a few times each minute while I worked. I wasn't sure
    whether he would just lie there, or try to use his illusory freedom - after
    all, he was totally unrestrained - to make a bid for escape. Frankly, I
    didn't care which. There was no way out for him, but it would be amusing to
    watch him try. 
     | 
    
     I am dead. But I want his death, too. I try to
    think, to keep the pain in a corner and to think. 
    I cannot use my hands. But I can use my feet.
    There is blood on the floor, blood and piss. I could write something for
    the police. But he would see it. I look around. There are some carpets,
    plastic carpets, very near, I can reach them with my feet. I stretch my
    legs, I cannot move without causing myself pain, but I want vengeance. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I couldn't tell whether he was trying to head for the stairs or just
    flailing around in agony. He was moving around, but didn't seem to be doing
    so in any purposeful way. Mostly it looked like he wast
    just smearing blood and urine around on the floor. I could not imagine why
    he would do that rather than lie still and try to ease his agony, but hey,
    the choice was his. 
     | 
    
     I reach the carpets, I push them away with my
    feet. I shudder in agony. 
    I put my right big toe into the pool of blood and
    I begin to write: 
    NON GARY 
    But I cannot go on, my energy is ebbing. It is a
    strain to move my foot. 
    I have to go on. I have to do it. He has to pay. 
    IL SUO VICINO 
    Why did I write it in Italian? I don't know, I
    hope it's enough, I cannot write anymore. I push the carpet back to hide
    the words I wrote, hoping the movement won't delete the writing. The pain
    from moving even slightly is terrible. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     And he was helping me, in a way. After all, the point was to make
    this crime scene so gruesome, so gory, that the police and the courts would
    be horrified enough to lock Gary up for the rest of his life. By spreading
    blood around, Fred was saving me the effort of having to do it myself. I
    chuckled under my breath. 
     | 
    
     I don't know if they'll see it. They have to see
    it! If they find a corpse... a corpse. My corpse. And suddenly I realise. I
    knew it, of course, I know that I am going to die, that I have no hope, but
    now I can SEE my naked corpse in the obituary. 
    I shudder, but I know I am doomed. 
    I'll be revenged! 
    I want to think that he'll die in a prison, in a
    madhouse. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     By the time I had the table and materials ready, Fred was still
    humping around on the floor like a worm, arms dragging lifelessly
    alongside. A pathetic but beautiful sight. 
     | 
    
     He is coming.. I hope he won't notice the carpets.
    But he is not looking that way. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Ready to squeal some more, little piggy?" I asked. He
    tried to cower away from me, but of course he couldn't escape. Ah, I love
    that feeling of power! Forget booze or drugs, THIS is the best high ever! 
    Three hours ago, if I had met this muscle-hunk on the street, he
    wouldn't have given me the time of day. Or if he had, it would have been to
    beat the crap out of me. He was just like Gary, indeed just like all those
    others, from elementary school all the way to today. So arrogant in their
    good looks, so confident in their muscular strength. His kind loves to walk
    all over guys like me, guys who don't have their looks or their build. 
    And yet look at him now: crawling on the floor, totally helpless,
    quaking in fear of little old me! Who's got the power now, you little turd? 
    I bent down and showed him the knife I was holding. "The show
    must go on, you know," I said. 
     | 
    
     "Ready, little pig?" 
    I am not ready, I want to stop, but of course I
    have no chance. This is his play, I am just a toy in his hands. 
    You know, the show must go on!" 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     He closed his eyes. "Open your eyes," I said, then
    immediately regretted it. One of my rules is: never give a command to a
    victim that he can disobey. I shouldn't have ordered him to open his eyes
    unless I was prepared to slice off his eyelids so he couldn't possibly
    close them. But I had done that with victim #2, and it hadn't had the
    desired effect. I had hoped to compel him to watch everything I did to him;
    instead, it had the opposite effect as his eyes kept filling with blood
    that he couldn't blink away.  
     | 
    
     I close my eyes. I don't want to see him anymore. 
    "Open your little eyes!" 
    But I keep them closed, completely closed. I think
    they'll find him, they'll arrest him, he'll spend his days in an asylum. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I brushed the tip of the knife across his cheek, then hoisted him up
    and began to carry him to the table. He was heavy, and I wasn't graceful
    about it. I couldn't just drag him, though, because I needed to get him up
    on top of the table I had prepared for him, and he wasn't going to get up
    there voluntarily. 
     | 
    
     The point of the blade is against my left cheek.
    He cuts. I bite my lips.. I don't want to scream. 
    He lifts me, a wave of pain runs through my body. 
    I don't understand what he is doing. He bends and
    I see his hair near my eyes, covered by a thin film of plastic. The idea
    strikes me. An evidence: his hair, his blood. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Suddenly, I saw stars as a sharp pain ripped through the back of my
    skull. The son-of-a-bitch had bitten me! 
     | 
    
     I bite, with all my force. I bite his head,
    tearing his hair and lacerating his skin. I can feel his hair in my mouth.
    I keep it between my teeth and my cheek. They'll find it. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "FUCK!" I shouted, dropping Fred to the floor.
    "You... you..." Words failed me. 
     | 
    
     He screams and he releases me. I fall. The pain is
    stunning, I almost faint. 
    He is in a frenzy of rage. 
    "You... you!" 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I slapped my hand to the back of my head and it came away bloody.
    Damn! The little shit must have bitten right through the plastic sheet
    covering my head. It hurt like hell, and I hopped around for a bit trying
    to cope with the pain. Oh, he was going to pay for that! I almost went
    after him with the knife right then. 
     | 
    
     Some drops of blood fall from his hair. He puts
    the blade against my throat. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     But I soon got my thoughts back under control. After all, he had
    simply been lashing out in the only way I had left him. He would need to be
    punished, of course, but it could wait because I had a bigger problem to
    deal with first: physical evidence. Traces of skin cells could be explained
    away, but it would be much harder to come up with a plausible excuse if the
    cops ever started asking why my blood was found here. I would have to clean
    it up. 
     | 
    
     Then he stops. He looks at me. He checks himself
    and he smiles. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "You're going to get a little break," I told him,
    "while I destroy every trace of the evidence you tried to leave. But
    when I'm done, you're going to get a little something extra for what you
    did. A bonus, say." 
     | 
    
     "You'll have a little break, you deserve it,
    but when I'll have destroyed every trace, you'll have a little extra, a
    bonus for this." 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I was done being kind. This time I dragged Fred over to the table by
    his arms, only lifting him up when I had him right next to the table. The
    pain from his shoulders was enough to ensure that he didn't try anything
    else while I was moving him into position. 
    I laid him flat on his back on top of the table. The table was
    sturdy, so it wouldn't be going anywhere as he struggled, but it was narrow
    so that his arms flopped over the edges and dangled down on either side. I
    ran a rope underneath the tabletop, then looped it across his chest a few
    times before tying it in place. I hoped this would frustrate him greatly -
    the knot was a simple one, easy to untie if he could only manage to lift his
    hands up to his chest, which of course he wouldn't be able to do. One more
    rope went around his waist. Then I tied his ankles to a spreader bar,
    holding them about three feet apart. Finally, I attached the spreader bar
    to the winch and lifted it until his legs were stretched up toward the
    ceiling. Fred kept mumbling while I was working, but I couldn't make out
    the words. I didn't much care what he might have to say, anyway. 
     | 
    
     He grabs my wrists and he begins to pull! The pain
    is so intense that I nearly faint. It's like my arms were torn from me. I
    try to scream, but I cannot, I only sigh, certainly this son of bitch is
    delighted to hear me. 
    Then he lifts me. What does he want to do, now? Is
    he going to let me drop again. No, please, don't. I cannot stand it, I
    cannot. 
    There is the table under my back, he is laying me
    on the table. What is he preparing, this kinky bastard? When does
    everything end? I want the end, I want to die. I cannot stand anymore. He
    has a rope, he is tying me. The chest, the waist, the ankles. What is he
    planning, what kinky idea is floating in his shitty mind? I am in panic,
    now. I should try to check myself, but it is useless, completely useless. 
    And now?! What's happening now? He is lifting my
    legs, up and up. 
    "You, son of bitch, you... You'll spend your
    life in a madhouse, they'll find you, you cannot escape." 
    He remains silent. I hate him, I hate him. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Once he was secured, I started cleaning up the mess. First I got a
    bandage over the wound, then sealed up the plastic sheet as best I could.
    It was hard to do, behind my head as it was, but the wall mirrors helped.
    Then I started searching for blood droplets. There didn't seem to be much
    of mine, but I really couldn't be certain. One red blotch look very much
    like another... Perhaps my best choice would be to make sure that the room
    became so liberally splashed with Fred's blood that any of mine would be
    like the proverbial needle in the haystack. That fit well with the plan,
    anyway. 
     | 
    
     He disappears. He is going to clean the floor, he
    was furious because he doesn't want to leave any trace. 
    But I have some of his hair in my mouth, between
    my teeth and my left cheek. If they open my mouth, they'll find it. And I
    SEE it again. My corpse and a doctor opening my mouth, a corpse's mouth, looking
    for traces. I shudder. 
    He cleans with great care the floor where some
    drops of his blood fell. He wants to destroy any evidence against him. 
    He works for a long time. I can breathe. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     When I was certain I was no longer shedding DNA bits into the room,
    I went back over to Fred. I cleaned a trickle of blood off his lips. It was
    probably his, but there was no sense taking the chance it might be mine.
    "OK, you had your break," I said when I had finished. "Time
    to get back to work." 
     | 
    
     Then he comes back. He cleans my lips, too. But he
    is lost. 
    He looks at me and he says: "OK, you had a
    pause. Time to work, now." 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I grasped his cock - still satisfyingly limp! - and balls with my
    gloved hands, squeezing both his intact nut and his destroyed one between
    my thumb and fingers. He tried to howl, but what came out sounded like
    sandpaper on wood. 
     | 
    
     He takes my nuts and my cock into his hands. I
    scream: the pain from my left nut is excruciating. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "I could start here," I said. "What do you
    think?" 
     | 
    
     "I could begin from here. What do you say
    about this?" 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "You are a kinky bastard!" he shouted. I chuckled, then
    released his doomed jewels. Their destruction would come later. 
     | 
    
     "You are a kinky bastard!" 
    He laughs. I hate him. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Next I picked up the butt plug and showed it to him. It was made of
    cold steel, six inches long and more than two inches thick at its widest
    point, narrowing to a half-inch-thick waist that would hold it in place
    once it was inserted. It also had a small projection on the end that I
    would be making use of later. I greased it up, then began working it into
    his ass. It was slow going, which was not too surprising given the thing's
    size, but I eventually crammed it in place. Just to make sure it stayed put,
    I slapped a strip of duct tape across it, securing it to his hairy ass
    cheeks. 
     | 
    
     He has something in his hand. What is it? He is
    showing it to me. It seems to be a butt-plug, but it's too large, too big,
    it cannot be. And suddenly I realize: he lifted my legs to expose my ass.
    He wants to put this thing into my ass. He is mad, but yes, he is mad, I
    know it. How can I stop a madman? I am not a psychiatrist. Perhaps there
    are words to say, it is possible to stop him, but how, how? 
    He is greasing the butt-plug and I shiver. Now he
    is approaching. 
    I have to relax, it will be less painful. Relax,
    let my asshole... Now, he is pushing. The plug is entering. OK, until now
    it is OK, my ass is not exactly a virgin one. OK, he stops. It is not so
    big. I can stand it. He is pushing again, the pain is increasing. I have to
    relax, to relax. I hope the largest part entered now, I couldn't stand
    anymore. NO! NO! Please, don't. I close my eyes, the pain is too strong.
    NOT MORE! NOT MORE! It's ripping my innards. My bowels ache. NO! 
    It's a stake, a stake impaling my ass. 
    Now, now it's done. Finally. It's painful to have
    such a large plug in my ass, I cannot stand it, I have to expel it. I have
    to... 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I lowered his legs down, disconnected them from the spreader bar,
    and tied them to either side of the narrow table. His knees were bent at
    ninety degree angles; one rope at his knees held them down onto the table's
    surface and two more fixed each ankle to a leg. I could see him straining
    to expel the invader from his ass, but it wasn't budging. 
    Next I pulled out my other invader - a slender steel rod, about five
    inches long and a quarter of an inch in diameter. I dangled it over Fred's
    face. 
     | 
    
     Now this son of bitch is lowering my legs. He is
    tying them again. The pain in my ass is increasing. I have to free myself.
    But I cannot, I cannot. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Know what this is, Fred?" I asked. He grunted something
    in reply. 
     | 
    
     I hear his bloody voice. He is moving something in
    front of my face. He asks me if I know what it is. 
    "Fuck you, you son of bitch. Fuck you!" 
    I can hardly hear my voice. I don't know if he can
    hear it. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "This is going into your dick," I said. "But there's
    one little problem. See how it's got a threaded hole in the side? That's
    there so that I can screw a second rod into the side to hold it in place so
    it won't slide right out. But that only works if you have a Prince Albert
    piercing, which I can see you don't. Ergo, you're going to have to get one
    before I continue." 
     | 
    
     "This is going... into your dick!" He is
    smiling and I shudder. 
    He is saying something more, but I don't
    understand, I don't want to understand. He is talking about a piercing,
    like Prince. The singer? He is mad and I am lost. I try to free myself, but
    the ropes are strong and I cannot use my arms. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     He began squirming on the table. The ropes held just fine. 
    I set the rod down and picked up a needle, a fat 10-gauger with a
    wickedly sharp point. I showed it to him, letting him see just how thick it
    was and how the light glinted off the tip. Then I moved to his waist and
    picked up his cock in my left hand. Teasing the foreskin back from the
    head, I pried his piss slit open and gently inserted the needle. When it
    had gone in about the right distance, I angled it so the point aimed at the
    underside of his shaft. 
     | 
    
     He shows me a long needle. I shudder. He is taking
    my dick. No! Please, don't! He begins to insert the needle. My God, My God,
    please, please. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Now ordinarily," I said, "when you get this kind of
    a piercing, you have to take very careful precautions with sterility,
    because you don't want to get an infection in this very precious bit of
    your anatomy. It could interfere with the healing of the piercing and cause
    you all sorts of other trouble, too. But I think you and I both know that
    elaborate hygiene precautions are just not necessary in this case, are
    they? So I'll just go ahead and push..." 
     | 
    
     He goes on speaking, he is amusing himself, he
    likes to explain. I hate him. Aaaaaaaaah! He is
    severing my cock! Aaah! I almost faint, again. It
    is not the pain, not only the pain. I don't want it. He is going to kill
    me, he cannot to... Aaaaaaaaaaaaah! 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     With the needle angled right, I applied pressure. He didn't like
    that at all. I could see the dent it raised on the underside of his cock. A
    little more pressure and it poked right through, eliciting more ragged
    rasps from Fred's torn-up throat. There was surprisingly little blood, only
    a trickle. I slid the needle out, leaving a nice, round hole behind for me
    to use later. 
     | 
    
     I see a soldier severing my cock, I hear bombs
    exploding and wounded soldiers shouting, yelling. For a brief moment, I am
    not here, I am far away, in another land of death and despair, where men
    are fighting and killing. I am wounded, I am going to die, my enemy will
    have his trophy. 
    Then I come back to this room and I see him, his
    smile. I hate him, but I am completely spent. I cannot speak anymore. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Next I picked up the rod, slathered it with grease, and set it in
    place at the tip of his cock. I stretched the lips open and slowly began to
    slide the rod into his dick. It wouldn't go in easily. I kept having to
    slide it out to apply more lube. With each try, it slid deeper and deeper
    into his cock until on about the fifth try, I got it in far enough that the
    hole in its side reached the piercing I had just made. I squeezed the
    second rod through the still-bloody piercing and fumbled around until I
    felt the two pieces mesh together. A few twists of the smaller bar and I
    was done. Fred now had four inches of steel buried deep in his dick, held
    in place by a second bar sticking out the underside of his cock. Another
    inch protruded from the tip. I flicked the exposed end a bit, enjoying the
    way he twitched each time I hit it with my finger. 
     | 
    
     Now he has a rod in his hands and he approaches it
    to my dickhead. I don't feel the needle, he slid it out. He is inserting
    the rod into my cock! I try to struggle, but it is useless, I am tied and he has my cock in his hands. Pain, more pain.
    He is pushing and pushing. It's a red-hot iron. I yell, but I can hardly
    hear the sound of my voice. 
    Again the world disappears. Three soldiers are
    kneeling around me. They are laughing, while a fourth soldier is cutting my
    dick. "A good prize!". He shows it to his companions. 
    I come back to reality. This son of bitch is
    playing with my dick. I don't know what he did, but every time he touches
    it, the pain increases. Then he stops. A little pause. Time to breathe. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Time for the next step. I knew this would get a good reaction from
    him, and I was not disappointed. I held up a pair of wires in front of his
    eyes. He registered what they were, and then absolutely exploded. The table
    shook and rocked as he fought to break free. His arms swung around like
    pendulums, but my five simple ropes were enough to hold him immobilized. 
     | 
    
     He is showing me something. What is it? Wires.
    Wires? The plug in my ass is a iron one and the rod in my dick too. No, it
    is not possible. No! NO! NO! I struggle, I cannot stand it, I cannot... 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "I see you can guess what's about to happen," I said.
    "Well, I won't keep you waiting." The wires ended in alligator
    clips. One clamped on to the little protrusion of the butt plug, the other
    clipped smartly onto the PA rod. The wires led to a dimmer switch, a little
    $2.00 hardware store thingy intended to provide ambience in a dining room.
    His struggles stopped; I imagine he was wondering what the next step would feel
    like. His eyes were glued to me as I made sure the switch was on its lowest
    setting, then slipped the plug into the wall outlet. 
    Now I had a complete circuit. Electricity would come out from the
    wall through one wire and return through the other, but the only way it
    could get from one wire to the other was by traveling
    through Fred's dick to his ass, with his prostate gland sitting smack dab
    between the two. Right now, with the dimmer switch providing a large
    resistance, no current was flowing. But that would change. 
     | 
    
     "You guess what's going to happen to
    you...!" 
    I cannot see what he is doing, but I know it. He
    is connecting the plug in my butt and the rod in my dick. And now he is
    inserting the plug into the current-tap. No, please, don't, don't. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     This was the first time I had played with electricity this way, and
    I wasn't entirely certain what to expect, so I took it easy. Slowly, ever
    so slowly, I cranked the switch higher. There was no reaction from him at
    first, so I kept turning the dial. Then all of a sudden, once the switch
    reached a certain point, things changed rapidly. 
    The first hint was a twitch in his dick. He started moaning a bit,
    but I think it was more in anticipation than from actual pain. Then the
    pain hit, and it was obvious when it did: the moan changed to a series of
    shouts and he began to struggle harder against the ropes. There was still
    no visible indication from his dick, though, except for that slight twitch.
    Turning the dimmer slightly further brought his screams to a new level, and
    he began bucking his hips in a way that might have been voluntary or might
    have been electrically induced; I just couldn't be sure. 
     | 
    
     The first shock is not too strong, I can bear it.
    I grind my teeth, but it is not so terrible. I know he is going to increase
    it, I know it. I am sweating. The shock is stronger now, it's like having
    something hot into my cock and my ass. I moan. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
    The pain in my cock is unbearable. I cannot stand it. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
    My cock, my cock is going to explode. No, please, don't, don't. My ass too,
    my ass, no, please, don't, don't. 
    The shocks are less strong, now, and again the
    world disappears. The soldiers are laughing, they are fucking me, one in my
    ass and one in front of me. I haven't a dick anymore, he is fucking my
    wound. 
    I slowly come back, I am in this room. I am
    crying. I close my eyes, I don't want to see anymore. I want to die. He'll
    kill me, now, he'll kill me. The soldiers will kill me, no, there aren't
    any soldiers, he is... he is... 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I set the dimmer switch down for a minute to stroke myself through
    my pants, making sure Fred could see me doing it... or could have if he
    hadn't decided to squeeze his eyes shut. He stubbornly refused to open
    them, though, so I decided to make him do the stroking. I lifted his arm up
    and placed his hand over my crotch so he couldn't help but notice the
    reaction I was having. His hand spasmed,
    clenching and releasing my cock repeatedly until I nearly went over the
    edge and had to back away quickly and take a few deep breaths. 
     | 
    
     Now he is lifting my arm. Pain, pain. My hand is
    touching... his cock, he has a boner, the man enjoys it, I want to grab it,
    to tear it apart, I want to castrate him... The soldier ... 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Taking up the dimmer switch again, I dropped the intensity to zero.
    He deflated like a balloon, sagging against the table. I let him rest for a
    minute, then cranked the switch up again. He tautened up like a violin
    string, and I turned that metaphor over in my mind a few times, thinking of
    how I was the violinist, the dimmer switch was my bow, and he was my
    string, singing in response to the touch I applied to him... 
     | 
    
     The shocks stop. I can breathe. I am exhausted. I
    think I still have his hair in my mouth. I can feel it. It's good to know
    I'll be avenged. 
    The shocks again! My cock is exploding. I cannot
    bear it, I cannot... 
    A vision, again, the soldiers torturing me, they
    want to know, they want... but I haven't anything to tell... 
    I see him, this son of bitch looking at me, no, it
    is not the son of bitch, it's a soldier, he wants to know the password, but
    I don't... NO, NO! 
    I look at him, at his smile. I hate him. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I experimented with the current level for a while, finding out what
    levels of pain I could cause him. It was interesting to watch, because
    throughout it all, there was no visible indication that I was hurting him.
    Current flowed through him at various levels and all I could see was his reaction.
    It wasn't like dislocating his shoulders, where it was obvious what I had
    done to him. This was invisible torment. I could see why electrical torture
    appealed to repressive third-world governments - agony galore with no
    inconvenient marks on the victim afterward. 
     | 
    
     The shocks again! My cock is exploding. I cannot
    bear it, I cannot... 
    My senses are starting to numb. I go out of
    consciousness. 
    The rooms vanishes, the soldiers, they are not
    soldiers, they are devils, they are fucking me with their huge hot cocks.
    Their nails are tearing apart my cock. They are ravaging my ass. 
    The fire, the fire is devouring my innards. He... 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Finally I left the switch on a setting right on the line between
    pain that was uncomfortable but tolerable and pain that utterly blinded him
    to any other sensation. "Now," I said, "it's time to talk
    about that little biting incident." Fred tried to say something in
    reply, but it was utterly unintelligible. 
     | 
    
     The pain is stronger and suddenly I am conscious
    again. I open my eyes, I can see him, his smile. I would give everything I
    have to stop this smile, but I haven't anything, I am just a dead man. I
    cannot breathe. 
    The shocks are less strong, now. He is saying
    something, but I cannot hear him. I try to answer: 
    "You... you..." 
    I scream and the world is disappearing. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "We're nearing the end of our time together," I said.
    "After I'm finished playing with the electricity, I'm going to make a
    small cut in your belly and start removing your internal organs. Intestines,
    kidneys, spleen, stomach, liver... the works. I'm going to take them out,
    one by one, and strew them around the room so as to make an incredibly
    gruesome crime scene for the cops to find. 
     | 
    
     He is telling me something, he'll take all my
    organs out of my body. He is mad, he is mad. He is speaking, he is telling
    his intentions, he is mad. He goes on speaking and speaking, but his voice
    is fading, it's far, so far... 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "You will almost certainly not survive the process. You will
    lose a lot of blood, and you will go into shock, and I suspect your body
    will simply shut down before I'm finished. But just in case you somehow
    stay alive all the way to the end, I want you to know that I'll be leaving your
    heart and lungs in place. There will be no quick exit for you that way. 
    "And when I finally get home after all my work tonight, you
    know what I'm going to do? I am going to rub out the most mind-blowingly, stupefying intense load of spunk you can
    possibly imagine. I'm talking about the orgasm to end all orgasms. After
    all the stimulation I've built up from working you over, it'll last for
    hours. Days, maybe." 
    I looked him in the eye. He stared up at me, eyes vacantly pleading.
    "But you," I continued, "have already blown your final load.
    Now, I had been planning to allow you to die a man. But that nasty bite of
    yours demands some kind of response. And so I'm going to remove your
    remaining testicle. When you die, it will not be as a man but as a eunuch,
    a non-man, a creature unworthy of the adjective 'male'. 
     | 
    
     I am impaled in front of a crowd and a man is
    smiling. He has a torch in his hand, I can feel the flame approaching my
    cock. My cock is burning, it is burning... 
    I wake up suddenly. I don't realize where I am, I
    don't remember anything. Then, suddenly, everything comes back. I look at
    him, at my murderer. He is smiling. 
    With my tongue I can feel his hair. He is lost.
    But now even this doesn't matter. I only want to rest, to die. I am
    exhausted. My body aches, but the pain is confused, I couldn't say where it
    comes from, I only feel it in my whole body. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "Say good-bye to your prize, Fred. Right now." 
     | 
    
     "Time for your prize!" 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I took one more length of rope and wrapped it around the base of his
    ball sac, pulling it as tight as I could get it and tying it off. It was
    kind of exciting, working so close to the electricity that was still
    coursing through Fred's body. I was touching the circuit but not part of
    it, so I was effectively immune to it. It couldn't hurt me, couldn't touch
    me. Nothing could touch me! 
     | 
    
     I can feel his hand grabbing one of my nuts. My
    only nut, I remember. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     After tying his ball, I showed Fred the knife in my hand, then
    brought it down to his crotch. It sliced easily through the taut skin. The
    pressure of the rope caused the nut to try to squeeze out of the hole I was
    making before it was even large enough to fit through. As soon as there was
    enough room, it popped free and fell to the table. I used the knife to
    sever the cord holding it to his body, then picked it up and held it over
    Fred's face. He was trying so hard to scream, but nothing was coming out of
    his throat. 
     | 
    
     The knife. He is going to cut my nut, to revenge
    himself. NO! NO! But I cannot stop him. My nut aches, the pain is becoming
    stronger. And then it explodes, neat, stronger than ever. I yell, but I
    cannot hear my voice. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     "I should put this in your mouth," I said. "An object
    lesson in the consequences of biting your superiors. But you might choke on
    it, and I don't want you checking out early. So instead..." I threw
    his testicle over my shoulder, not even bothering to watch where it landed.
    It was, after all, just a piece of garbage. He croaked something, but I could
    see in his eyes he wasn't completely with me any more. 
     | 
    
     He goes on speaking and speaking. Stop him,
    please, stop him, I hate his voice. I hate him. I... 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     It's a shame, it always seems that a victim's mind is more fragile
    than his body. Inevitably, there comes a point where he realizes that he's
    already dead even though his heart is still beating. His mind gives up -
    dies - but his body stubbornly keeps clinging to existence for a while
    longer. Fred had clearly reached that point. There was nothing further I
    could threaten him with. No amount of pain could provoke him to further
    terror. 
     | 
    
     The room disappears. They are going to shoot me.
    They drag me, I cannot stand. They tortured me, my body aches. They are
    going to kill me. The sergeant is smiling, he has a sadistic smile. He
    enjoys the idea of killing me. I hate him, I hate him. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     I was getting tired. It was late, there was still a lot of work to
    be done, and Fred had passed the point where he was interesting to me. I've
    learned after doing this a few times that most of the joy is in the
    anticipation, not the actual doing. Now it was just work to ensure that the
    appropriate person got blamed. 
    So I worked. I very quickly cranked the dimmer switch up as far as
    it would go, holding it there for an eternal second before pressing the
    switch off. The room lights actually dimmed. Fred practically levitated off
    the table. Only the ropes held him down. After I turned off the current, I
    saw a tiny wisp of smoke coiling lazily up from where the lips of his penis
    stretched to meet the invading metal. Then I disconnected the wires,
    leaving both rods in place. 
     | 
    
     A violent shock, bullets entering my cock, my ass,
    they are shooting me, no, it isn't, the man, the madman, he is... the
    shocks. I scream or perhaps I just try to scream. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     After that, it was pretty mechanical. I used the knife to open up a
    four-inch long slice right through his navel, cutting through skin and
    muscle until I could see the pale grey coils of his intestines. I reached
    my gloved hand in, grabbed hold, and started pulling. Out it came,
    ridiculously long, so long it was impossible to imagine how the whole thing
    had once fit inside that taut belly, like watching a dozen clowns climb out
    of a Volkswagon. The stench was appalling. I
    dragged the snake-like thing across the room and draped it over the barre by one of the mirrored walls. 
     | 
    
     The room is floating. The soldiers again, they are
    looking at me, they think I am dead, but I am not, I can see them. The pain
    in my cock and in my ass is terrible, but I am still living. 
    The sergeant, his bloody smiling face over me...
    he has a knife, he stabs me, I can feel the blade entering my belly, the
    pain increases, but I am still alive. He is moving the blade, I... 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Colon. Appendix. Bladder. I had to use the knife to sever certain
    key attachment points, but I tried to avoid nicking major blood vessels.
    Kidneys. Spleen. Or was it a pancreas? Did it matter? 
     | 
    
     It's black, completely black. Am I in a tomb? They
    are burying me, but I can feel the blade of the shovel entering my belly... 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     Gall bladder. Stomach. Liver. Various ducts and tubes and glands and
    whatever else this meat machine had used to keep itself running. All
    carefully sliced out, then hurled across the room. Blood was everywhere. 
     | 
    
     It's cold, it's very cold. The pain is subsiding,
    but it's so cold. 
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     When I had finished, Fred was actually still breathing. I couldn't
    imagine how his diaphragm kept working, given that there was now nothing
    underneath it. Yet on and on it chugged. 
     | 
    
     I... don't...  
     | 
     | 
    
   
    | 
     It was possible, therefore, that his brain was still working, still
    perceiving sensations from the outside world, maybe even still generating
    thoughts. I could not even imagine what it might be thinking right now, if
    anything. Or the slow, ragged breaths could just be reflex, generated by
    the deep reptilian part of the brain long after the rest of it had stopped
    functioning. 
     | 
     | 
     | 
    
   
  I methodically canvassed the room, making sure that I had removed any
  trace of my presence here and that just enough of Gary was evident to make it
  seem like he had done a poor job of covering his tracks. That, plus the blood
  I would smear on Gary's steering wheel before wiping it - almost - all off
  again, plus the electronic trail from Fred's computer... all the bits and
  pieces would be just enough to convince a jury that Gary was a monster who
  should be locked up for life. By the time I was done, Fred's body had finally
  gone still. 
  The truly smart thing to do, of course, would have been to get out of
  town right away. The police would eventually follow the trail I had left
  them, but it might take them a while to put all the pieces together. And a
  truly prudent man would have used that time to make a clean escape just in
  case they somehow saw through the deception and deduced the real story. But I
  wanted to watch the scene play out, and that turned out to be my undoing. 
  Sure enough, eleven days after the gruesome murder of Ferdinando "Fred" Corotelli
  made national news, the police showed up at the condo building. They weren't
  there for Gary, though; they had come for me. As they led me out of the
  building in handcuffs, I could see Mrs. Jablonski
  standing next to Wanda Ermqvist, both of them
  pursing their lips and wearing "I told you so" expressions on their
  bovine faces. 
  How had they figured it out? Well, it turns out that Freddy-boy was smarter
  than I had given him credit for. I seriously underestimated him, in fact. In
  hindsight, it was because of his poor English. It's so easy to make the
  mistake of concluding that someone who doesn't speak clearly must not be able
  to think clearly either. That's a mistake I won't be making again. 
  While I had been setting up his electrocution, Fred had used the time
  and his own blood to paint the words "not Gary but his neighbor" on the floor. And he wrote it in Italian,
  which led the cops to believe it was really his writing and not just another
  red herring. But more than that, the little twerp had not bitten me just to
  lash out, as I had thought. No, he had deliberately chewed through my plastic
  evidence-suppression cloak to get a sample of my skin and hair, which he held
  in his mouth the entire time after that. 
  I have to give him a lot of credit. He managed to keep a scrap of my
  hair between his teeth and his cheek the whole time I was zapping his dick,
  slicing off his one remaining ball, and generally tearing his body apart.
  What strength of will! His capacity to plan may not quite have rivaled my own, but he sure came close. To have conceived
  of such an idea on short notice and under duress... he was more than just a
  hunky body, he was an impressive mind, too. 
  So, here I sit, in my six-by-eight foot cell, isolated from all human
  contact for twenty-three hours a day, unable to see the sun or feel the wind
  on my skin. It's a dull, dull, dull existence, and one would presume that the
  prospect of spending the rest of my life in a place with so little mental
  stimulation would drive someone of my intellectual abilities out of his mind. 
  But boredom doesn't bother me, if it's for a greater cause. I am using
  the time to plan my escape. The thought of spending the rest of my life
  locked up in this rat hole doesn't drive me crazy because I have no intention
  of staying here that long. One of these days, I will be free again.
  Sometimes, I spend the long hours fantasizing about what I will do with my
  liberty once I have attained it. I imagine dropping in on Gary, or saying
  hello to Ferdinando's family, or having a nice
  little tete-a-tete with
  the detective who wouldn't settle for the easy, obvious answer and kept
  digging until he found me. Or I imagine picking up and starting a new life,
  perhaps in Mexico where law enforcement has a more relaxed attitude than in
  the U.S. 
  Of course, such musings distract me from my real work: planning my
  escape. But that's not a big problem, because I have nothing but time.
  Already I have come up with three different ways that I could make my getaway
  if the right opportunity comes along. And I can wait years, if necessary, for
  the right opportunity to come along. 
  After all, it takes a long
  time to prepare a truly satisfying plan. 
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